AliveInAutumn23

I remember my childhood in hues. First it was green. I discovered nature and it swallowed me whole. I bit into a leaf once, A bitter crunch I will never forget. I imagine myself in the pines, And I want to sleep there. I want to be decorated in flowers and dirt. Then it was orange. I saw the sun as a beacon. It raised high in the air like a balloon I set free once. I loved it when it set, And then it stole my eyes forever. Then it was purple. I lost myself to the rain. I write poetry on the moon, And live beneath the stars. I am a lonely dreamer. I wake up with bruises, And my body is made of shadows and lines. I trace them, An

You are the rock on my chest, Holding me beneath the river, As water fills my lungs, Like smoke. I am breathless, As you pressure my heart, Into falling for you, Knowing full well, You’ll only weigh me down.

You always went away on business trips And I would sit on my queen’s throne Dangling my legs over the edge of your bed As you’d kneel before me And carefully fold Each blouse and pair of pants To place into your giant suitcase. I always hoped you’d fold me up too With your silky arms And tuck me into your suitcase The way you soothed me good night Because I’d never feel more alone Than when you were gone. Though I may have been queen, You were always God.

I clung to you in that moment, Like you were the only real thing left to hold onto. I grasped for your flesh, your hair, your lips, Anything that was mortal contact, skin to skin, human to human, But we weren’t humans that night. We were imaginary, Like something out of a dream, And something I thought would never come true, But somehow it did, And so just in that moment I clung to you, Like I knew I’d never get the chance to touch you like that again, Or feel you as intensely, As I felt every other emotion under the sun that night, Or should I say under the stars? Because that’s where we were, Under the stars I saw every d